LOSING GAME

Depraved, awful and horny, Virgin Island’ think a Love Island’ for adult virgins could be disastrous. But Channel 4 makes this vital reality show work

- Hannah Ewens

In the very first episode of Channel 4's Virgin Island, 28-year-old virgin Zac finds himself irrepressibly horny. He immediately pushes past the bulk of his intimacy issues with the help of his "surrogate partner" Kat, who is described as "a highly trained therapist who is able to have sex with a client" (sure, OK). Zac strokes Kat's arm; in return she lasciviously eyes him as though he were Tom Hardy bulging out of a white T-shirt. This stroking is enough to fill the room with sexual tension, to assure an audience of the palpable clamminess of Zac’s uninitiated brow.

The voiceover lady says what we’re all thinking: “The speed of the surrogate programme doesn’t seem to be moving fast enough for Zac.” This man – a virgin, and surely not for lack of willing – is ready togo.

Before we get into the specifics of this ethical minefield of a reality dating show, let’s explore the premise. It’s obviously the brainchild of a mid-thirties creative producer who dared to dream, “What if: Love Island but for adult virgins?” It follows the stories of 12 virgins aged between 22 and 30 (so Gen Z and young millennials) who have chosen to go on a luxury retreat somewhere in the Med to take a “unique” (the press pack materials are not kidding) course in intimacy.

Will they achieve their ultimate aim of losing their virginity? Only the first two episodes of six were provided to journalists, but it’s safe to predict that for at least some of the contestants, full heterosexual penetrative sex will be had.