Prøve GULL - Gratis
I'm falling for a smoker... but I can't bear his filthy habit
The Independent
|October 16, 2025
The Indy's agony aunt Victoria Richards is here to help

Dear Vix,
I've just met someone amazing (online). We have loads in common and the chat is sparky; I find him interesting and want to know much more about him - plus... I fancy the pants off him. Literally.
But, there’s a snag: he’s a smoker. And I’m not. In fact, it’s not just that I “don’t really like” cigarettes - I can’t bear them. I hate the smell, the taste, the look - I find them physically repulsive and would never want my home or my clothes to stink of smoke. I’m so glad we've got a smoking ban in public places, now. I just wish they'd ban fags completely from public spaces, parks - even pub beer gardens.
As you can tell, I really have a thing about smoking! In fact, I'd say it’s a dealbreaker. But now my “dream date” comes along - and he smokes!
My question is: am I an idiot for not giving him a chance for this one, simple reason? Is it enough of a dealbreaker to sack him off before the relationship has even begun? I'll admit that it feels like my fault - after all, I swiped right on him, despite seeing he'd said “yes” to smoking in his profile - but now that we've actually met, I'm so gutted about it. On our first date we kissed, but I could taste cigarettes. I’m so frustrated! Other than this, he’s perfect!
Is it okay to hope he changes and kicks the habit? Or should I kick him - to the curb?
Non Smoker
Denne historien er fra October 16, 2025-utgaven av The Independent.
Abonner på Magzter GOLD for å få tilgang til tusenvis av kuraterte premiumhistorier og over 9000 magasiner og aviser.
Allerede abonnent? Logg på
FLERE HISTORIER FRA The Independent

The Independent
Gaza left in environmental freefall after two-year war
Gaza’s water, sanitation, and energy systems are on the brink of a total collapse after nearly two years of war.
3 mins
October 17, 2025

The Independent
You're in spy territory now
Witness statements shed fresh light on the China spy case, alleging the accused men communicated with each other
3 mins
October 17, 2025

The Independent
Johnson praises ChatGPT as a 'fantastic' AI platform
Boris Johnson has admitted he “loves” AI and ChatGPT, and revealed that he uses it while writing his books.
2 mins
October 17, 2025

The Independent
Cardiff to impose higher parking charges for SUVs
A Welsh council could become the first in the UK to impose higher parking charges on drivers of large vehicles such as 4x4s in a bid to discourage people from buying them.
1 min
October 17, 2025

The Independent
MI5 thwarted China attack in past week, chief reveals
The head of MI5 has revealed Britain thwarted an attack from China just this week, as he issued a stark warning over the daily threat to the UK posed by Beijing.
4 mins
October 17, 2025

The Independent
Wincing through the disco
Tame Impala's new album, 'Deadbeat', begins with possibly the best opening track of the year, as he makes mountains out of social awkwardness molehills
3 mins
October 17, 2025

The Independent
Shiko, rattle and roll: sumo casts its spell on London
With professional sumo being held outside of Japan for just the second time ever, Alex Pattle reports on a transportive night of wrestling, salt and ritual at the Royal Albert Hall
5 mins
October 17, 2025

The Independent
How Palestine's 'Speed Sisters' allowed girls to dream in the face of war
Kieran Jackson talks to the trailblazers who in the Noughties formed the Arab world's first all-female motor-racing team
7 mins
October 17, 2025

The Independent
France's pension crisis may also spell trouble for Britain
Bankers warn compromise plan by French prime minister won't solve the nation's debt problem
3 mins
October 17, 2025

The Independent
Where does football go after Guardiola's ideology fades?
After 15 years of dominance, the Catalan's ideas of pressing and possession that gripped the game have now unravelled. Is this an 'end of history' moment
5 mins
October 17, 2025
Listen
Translate
Change font size