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A QUESTION OF LOVE

The Independent

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April 03, 2025

As Netflix's latest cheesy romcom 'The Life List' prompts people to break up with their partners, Olivia Petter asks whether we can learn something from its schmaltzy message

- Olivia Petter

A QUESTION OF LOVE

Nothing is harder to explain than the feeling of being in love. There’s no formula. No magical path or yellow brick road. No app some avaricious nerd in Silicon Valley can create to help you work it out – though I can’t imagine that will stop them from trying.

The trouble is that it’s not something you can just explain or whittle down to a set list of factors. You’re meant to just sort of know. And if you don’t, well, you might be in a tricky situation, particularly if you’re in a long-term relationship. That’s the premise of The Life List, a new romcom from Netflix that has soared to the number one spot around the world.

Based on the bestselling novel of the same name by Lori Nelson Spielman, the film tells the story of Alex (played by Sofia Carson), a young woman who’s coasting through life with a job in her mother’s cosmetics company and a boyfriend who develops zombie video games. The death of her mother (Connie Britton) to cancer prompts a shift, not least because, in her will, Alex is given nothing besides a DVD and a scrap of paper dubbed “the life list” of goals and dreams she’d written down as a child.

In the DVD, her mother explains that in order to access her inheritance, Alex has to complete everything on the list, which includes tasks ranging from the innocuous (“get a tattoo” and “camp under a full moon” ) to the lofty (“make peace with dad” and “find true love”). According to Alex’s mother, there’s one surefire way to test that last one if you’re currently in a relationship, and that’s to ask yourself the following four questions: “Is he kind? Can I tell him everything in my heart? Does he help me become the best version of myself? Can I imagine him as the father of my children?”

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