Why smart women still self-abandon

She knows better. She reads the signs. She teaches boundaries, speaks of self-worth, and encourages others to choose themselves.

- DR CHANDNI TUGNAIT

Yet, when it comes to her own life, the same clarity blurs. She stays too long in draining relationships, says yes when she means no, and over-gives while quietly shrinking inside.This is the paradox of many smart, emotionally intelligent women: they know what's healthy, yet they repeatedly self-abandon. It’s not a matter of weakness or ignorance. It's a deeper, more complex pattern that intellect alone cannot override.

Self-abandonment isn’t always loud or obvious. Sometimes, it’s disguised as compassion, compromise, or even independence. But at its core, it’s the quiet habit of putting one’s own needs, voice, or values aside to keep peace, avoid guilt, or meet unspoken expectations. Here's why even the smartest women fall into this cycle.

Dr Chandni Tugnait, MD (A.M) Psychotherapist, Life Alchemist, Coach & Healer, Founder & Director, Gateway of Healing shares few reasons why smart women still self-abandon-