Cheesy word for quirky birds

Collective nouns can be so cruel to birds.

- with STUART WINTER

Crows are defamed as murderers and ravens pilloried for their unkindness. Lapwings are decried for being deceitful and why an assembly of nuthatches is called a booby boggles the mind.

My frustrations about names for flocking birds came to a head last week while exploring the correct way to describe the stirring sight of ibises on the wing.

The approved term is a "wedge" but this brings to mind cheese, golf clubs, doorstops or Del Boy's back pocket cash reserves. No wonder I was left concluding collective nouns are a load of... You can fill in the gap.