Sex and love were her drugs

'Eat, Pray, Love' author Elizabeth Gilbert recounts her recovery in memoir.

- BY SAMANTHA FINK

ELIZABETH Gilbert's latest memoir is "All the Way to the River."

In 2000, Elizabeth Gilbert, a successful magazine writer and author of short stories who would go on to even greater acclaim with the publication of "Eat, Pray, Love: One Woman's Search for Everything Across Italy, India and Indonesia" six years later, went to get her hair cut by Rayya Elias and ended up meeting her best friend.

The two spent years as close friends through Gilbert's two marriages to men, adaptation of her memoir into a movie starring Julia Roberts and subsequent books - before Elias' 2016 terminal pancreatic and liver cancer diagnosis made Gilbert realize she was in love with her. They had a short but tumultuous relationship, battling each other over substance abuse issues as Elias' cancer progressed. When Elias died, Gilbert realized she was suffering from an addiction too: one to sex and love.

After that death, Gilbert set off on a journey of recovery that included a romance with Simon MacArthur, a longtime friend of Elias.

Gilbert's latest memoir, “All the Way to the River: Love, Loss, and Liberation,” is her account of how devastating heartbreak helped her come to terms with her addiction and set her on a path toward healing.

‘The Times spoke with Gilbert about how to recognize signs of sex and love addiction in ourselves and how to learn to be OK on our own. Now cleared for romance, the author has a sober dating plan intended to create boundaries and avoid jumping into another relationship too quickly.

“The better care I take of myself, the less stressful the world feels,” she says, “and whatever energy is left over, I pour into my work, my friends and my community.”

This interview has been condensed and edited for clarity.

What were some warning signs for you that you had a problem with sex and love?