I was a trained medic... but my Parkinson's diagnosis came out of the blue

As a doctor with years of experience in the NHS I am trained to diagnose... so how did I miss my own condition?

- 

When the neurologist leaned across his desk that day and told me: “I’m sorry to tell you, Jonny, you have Parkinson’s disease”, I was absolutely stunned. “Parkinsons? I just thought I was stressed.”

I knew something was wrong. I wasn't rotating my left wrist quickly when my brain was willing it to move. And when walking for prolonged periods, I found my left foot scuffing the floor.

But despite five years of medical school and nearly two decades as an emergency doctor in the NHS, Parkinson's hadn't even entered my head - never mind making it on to my differential diagnosis list. Wasn't this a disease that only old men had?

My thoughts went back to medical school when I had one 45-minute lecture on Parkinson's. I tried to recall words from my notes - “frail, hunched over and tremors” came to mind but that wasn't me.

I was 41, married to Heather with two young children, Ben, 10, and Anna, six, and working as a consultant in the busiest emergency department (ED) in the UK.

As I walked back to the car park it felt like the pause button had been pressed on my life. I had been blindsided and guilty and, to a degree, embarrassed I hadn't joined the dots.

With hindsight, it’s clear it is easier to spot clinical signs in others than yourself.

I was about to go through a period of metamorphosis. I was no longer who I was before but hadn't yet discovered how to embrace who I am now.

Initially, I struggled with the fear that came with the diagnosis, as uncertainty became the new norm. I thought I understood Parkinsons. I could describe the pathology, the symptoms, and the treatments. But as I learned how to live with it, I now understand the condition goes far beyond the clinical - it’s about empathy, adaptation, and connection.