Tired of my difficult husband but worry it's selfish to leave

Dear Coleen

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I AM a 50-year-old married mother of two daughters aged 26 and 29. For the past five years, I've known that although I love my husband, I'm not in love with him any more. I love him because he's the father of my children.

Life hasn't been easy - he's a challenge to say the least. He has a fractured relationship with our eldest daughter and doesn't think about what he says or how it may affect others.

I've always tried to smooth over the cracks and keep the peace, but it's draining.

He used to drink heavily every day and we can still smell alcohol on him. I've tried to help, suggesting he needs to talk to someone and I've offered to go with him, but he refuses and instead plays the victim.