Beware the placeholder relationship

A FRIEND OF MINE GOT OUT OF A SIX-YEAR RELATION-ship, only to have her ex marry someone new within six months.

- MEEHIKA BARUA

Another woman I met at a networking event recently has been with her boyfriend for a decade, waiting on a ring. Every time they go on a vacation, she wonders if this holiday will be the one where he will propose, only to be dejected on the flight back home.

I never had the heart to tell these women they were placeholders, but they fit the bill for a relationship term that’s all over social media: a “placeholder partner” is good enough to date, live with, or even spend years alongside, but never the person their partner actually plans to commit to in the long term. They’re the “in the meantime” partner, until the real one comes along. And now that I’m aware of the idea, it is one of my biggest fears—even as it has taught me my own value.