Defusing Financial Flash Points

MONEY SMART WOMEN

- JANET BODNAR

ONE thing I learned when writing about gray divorce (see “Money Smart Women,” July) is that money is often a factor in later-in-life divorces, but not always how you would expect. Even though women may take a big hit money-wise when they leave a long-term marriage, they sometimes file for divorce anyway because they chafe under the financial control of their spouse.

Financial control is one of a number of money hot spots that flare up between couples. That’s because when it comes to money, opposites often attract. One of you may be a saver while the other is a spender. One of you tracks your cash with bean-counter zeal while the other can’t be bothered even to look at the bank or credit card statements.

Frequently, the root of the problem is a reluctance to talk about money, and sometimes even a temptation to lie about it. In a recent survey by Forbes Advisor on the topic of financial infidelity, 38% of those interviewed admitted to lying to a partner about finances.