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Modern Manners

Real Simple

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Summer 2025

Advice for Your Social Dilemmas

- BY JENNA BUSH HAGER & BARBARA PIERCE BUSH

Modern Manners

MELISSA ASKS...

What's the timeline for sending thank-you notes for wedding shower and wedding gifts? I know they used to say you had a year for wedding gifts. That feels like way too long. Thoughts?

BARBARA PIERCE BUSH: I think a year feels long, but at the same time, you want to be living in the moment. You want to be relishing the experience and feeling loved right after your wedding and shower, rather than stressing about checking things off your to-do list.

JENNA BUSH HAGER: Yes, you want to be present, so take your time. Once you have a little extra time, sit down and write your thank-you notes. The most important thing is to do it. If you do it sooner rather than later, then it won't fall off your to-do list, but no pressure. My advice is to get it done within the first seven to eight months.

BPB: Yes, give yourself the gift of time. When you do sit down to write them, try to make them as personal as you can. Talk about how you'll use the gift, include a memory of your interactions at the shower or wedding, and go for thoughtful over generic. Congratulations, by the way!

HAVE AN ETIQUETTE QUESTION?

Hover your phone's camera here to submit your question for Jenna and a friend, or email them at modernmanners@realsimple.com.

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