PLAN C: Navigating infertility

Sheila Vijeyarasa redefined success, motherhood and her self-worth by surrendering old expectations, embracing the unknown and finding deep transformation through adversity.

- Words by Jessica Lee

It's not every day you find yourself being filmed while you sit on the toilet, trying to urinate on a pregnancy test strip. Yet this is exactly the situation Sheila Vijeyarasa found herself in. In her latest book, The Power of Little Steps, she writes, “As I sit here, with a camera capturing every awkward angle, I can’t help but wonder: ‘How did I get here?’ ‘This wasn't the plan!’”

This intimate moment was being filmed for Channel 9 documentary Big Miracles, a behind-the-scenes look at the hope and heartbreak of infertility and in-vitro fertilisation (IVF). According to IVF Australia, “One in six Australian couples of reproductive age experience difficulties conceiving a child.” For so many couples and single women, becoming a parent requires an incredible amount of medical intervention.

This was certainly true for Vijeyarasa and her husband Tyson Salijevic. While they knew IVF would be difficult, they had no idea how physically and emotionally exhausting it would be. They didn’t know how much grief they would face or the bravery they would need to become parents.

The IVF journey

At age 38, Vijeyarasa had a successful career and was in a serious long-term relationship. However, when that relationship ended, she wasn't ready to give up her dream of becoming a mum, so she froze her eggs. It wasn't until she was 45 that she met her husband-to-be, Salijevic, who was 46. While they met later in life, they fell in love quickly.