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My TikTok Fame Is the Best- and Worst-Thing to Ever Happen to Me

Cosmopolitan US

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September - October 2023

Nearly 15 million Tik Tok followers: amazing! The mental health struggles that came with them: not so much.

-  MIKAYLA NOGUEIRA

My TikTok Fame Is the Best- and Worst-Thing to Ever Happen to Me

I love beauty. I love filming. I love entertaining people. It's who I am. And who my fans have come to expect. They've been tuning in to my beauty reviews and transformation videos since 2020. They've watched me meet Selena Gomez (!) and Rihanna (!!), collaborate with beauty brands like Glow Recipe, and even create a lip kit with e.l.f. What they haven't seen is my mental health rapidly deteriorate, to the point where I had to seriously rethink my entire career.

Of course, I always knew there were dangers to working in social media. When I was a teenager, I used Instagram to fuel an eating disorder and body dysmorphia. As an adult, I thought TikTok with its emphasis on real people doing real things-would be different. I used the platform to create my brand, which is essentially me being a straight shooter, giving out no-BS beauty info and advice. Even so, I quickly realized my job is not normal.

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