HOW TO PREPARE FOR DIVORCE

You've decided to end your marriage, but what now? Here's how to create a roadmap to help you navigate this major life change

- CLYDE ADAMS-VISTER

DIVORCE is rarely a sudden decision, although it may feel that way when the words are finally spoken out loud. For many the emotional weight of this acknowledgment is overwhelming enough but beneath the pain lies a more immediate concern - how do you prepare for the practical reality of ending a marriage?

The legal, financial and emotional preparation required can feel daunting. But like any significant life transition divorce becomes more manageable when approached with knowledge, planning and the right support system.

“Divorce or separation can be costly, draining and time-consuming,” says Naëtt Atkinson, an internationally accredited mediator who has guided more than 100 couples through the process. Preparation, she says, is the real game-changer.

“With the right planning and support couples can avoid needless stress, conflict and expense.”

Her passion comes from personal experience. “I've been through both an amicable divorce and a traumatic, costly breakup. Having endured the pain myself I want to help others avoid the same.”

For some, getting divorced is straightforward. For others, it’s incredibly complicated. It depends entirely on the people involved.

Whatever the case, you can't afford not to prepare properly, says specialist family law attorney Martin Vermaak, director of Martin Vermaak Attorneys. “Preparation is leverage. It means verified numbers, a clean document pack, a short timeline with key dates, a practical parenting proposal and disciplined communication.”

THE FIRST STEPS

“Divorce is not a linear process,” Atkinson says. “It doesn't follow a neat, step-by-step path. Emotions, legal issues and financial decisions often overlap and just when you think you've made progress, something new can come up. That's why it's so important to plan carefully but also stay flexible.”

She recommends creating an action plan around your finances, family issues and legal matters.