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Discover your NO

Australian Women’s Weekly NZ

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July 2022

It's only a little word and yet when used in the right context, it can change your day, your week, and even your life. The only catch? You've got to say it!

- DOMONIQUE BERTOLUCCI

Discover your NO

If you feel like you're constantly being pulled in a million and one different directions, never having anything left for you, it's time for you to discover the power of "no", "no, thank you", and "not now" and "not ever". One of the first words most children learn, not long after "mama" or "dada", is "NO". By the age of two, not only do most children know exactly what "no" means, but they have already become rather proficient at using it too. Yet somewhere along the way, the ability to clearly and firmly say "no" to the things we don't want to do gets lost. As adults, most people find it harder and harder to say "no", and a whole lot easier to say "yes", regardless of how they really feel.

Does this scenario feel familiar? You find yourself running around, feeling pushed from pillar to post, trying to keep everyone else happy, meet their needs, fulfill their requirements and comply with their requests. At the end of the day, you realize that you've run out of time or energy for the things that you need. You feel exhausted, frustrated, and resentful. And the worst part is that it's not the first or last time this will happen. The good news is that not only will learning how to create and maintain clear boundaries in your life change the way you think and feel about what everyone else wants from you, but having clear boundaries will also make it so much easier to actually do the things you want to do for yourself.

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