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Give Love, Receive Love
Feast Magazine
|February 2020
The Path to Grace-filled relationships
I bet you know what curse-filled relationships look like: a lot of fighting, factions, and frustrations. You also know what grace-filled relationships look like: a lot of forgiveness, forbearance, and faithfulness.
How do relationships become cursed? Just follow this recipe: Control others, submit to yourself. Follow only yourself—and let others follow you, too!
Everyone wants to control others. In fact, controlling others becomes an addiction. We want it. We crave for it. We salivate for it. Why? For many people, controlling others is the only way to satisfy the deepest longings of their heart. People are wounded. And the only salve they know to heal their wounded heart is controlling other people to give them what they want.
They do it through anger, intimidation, shame, manipulation, or people-pleasing.
But I’ve realized that control is the language of the weak.
It’s the strong who can let go and let God.
But if you want a grace-filled relationship, follow the exact opposite recipe: Control yourself, submit to others.
Only Strong People Can Submit
If the language of the weak is control, the language of the strong is submission.
Submission is the language of love.
First, submit to God. You submit to God and find your complete fulfillment in His love. You don’t need others to behave in a particular way for you to be happy. You’re already complete.
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