Brave New Woman

SHE IS SINGLE BY CHOICE, NOT BECAUSE MR RIGHT DIDN’T COME ALONG. AND SHE IS PUTTING UP WITH PRIGGISH SOCIETAL NORMS TO CELEBRATE HER FREEDOM

- Chinki Sinha

STANDING IN HER BALCONY in New Delhi’s cramped Lajpat Nagar locality, she stares into the distance, thinking of the things that once brought her joy but now sit around her apartment gathering dust, like the guitar she hasn’t strummed in a while. Break-ups are tough. Commitment even tougher. At 39, Chandni (name changed on request), is certain she will never marry. An arts and culture consultant, she is part of a demographic that is fast becoming an economic and political force to reckon with—the single woman.

The 2011 census records a most staggering statistic: a 68 per cent decadal increase in the ranks of the nevermarried woman in the age group 35-44 years. See this in the context of the 27 per cent overall increase in the number of women in the same age bracket over the same period. And now wrap your head around the significance of these two seemingly innocuous pieces of data. These numbers are a statistical validation of an emergent reality most of us have some anecdotal evidence of—the rise of the unattached, independent woman, who has rejected the socially sanctioned default setting of a married life.

The urban Indian single woman is answerable to no one but herself. She is armed with an education and a career and the empowering financial independence it brings. Her life choices are her own. She works hard and parties, if she so pleases, even harder. She may have a partner in her life, or a friend with benefits, or no one at all. She is travelling places, solo or with soul sisters. She gets lonely, but thinks marriage is too heavy a price to pay for her independence. She does not need marriage for a fulfilling life, or children—adoption and IVF help her realise her goal of motherhood.