Breaking the Cycle

He survived 15 seasons playing pro football. Yet nothing compared to the violence in his home growing up. As an NFL executive, husband and father, he’s committed to…

- TROY VINCENT SR

THE SOUND IS SEARED INTO my memory. Heavy footsteps. Pounding. Screaming. A storm of violence on the other side of my bedroom wall. More heavy footsteps and a slammed door. Eerie silence.

I was just seven years old when my mom’s boyfriend, the father of my younger brother, terrorized our family. He was a jealous, controlling man with a volcanic temper. If another man as much as looked at Mom on the street, she was in for a beating.

My brother and I cowered, terrified. When the storm had passed, I crept through the apartment, eventually finding my mom sprawled unconscious and bloody. I ran into the hall and knocked on neighbors’ doors. No one dared answer. I had to go to the bar next door to call 911 on a payphone.

I grew up to become a star defensive player and a high-ranking executive for the National Football League. During my 15 seasons in the NFL, I played 207 games, intercepted 47 passes and racked up nearly 900 tackles. Yet nothing in my career as a hard-hitting defensive back compares to the violence experienced by my family growing up.

Which is why my life on and off the field has been devoted to combating domestic abuse and promoting the dignity of women and the responsibility of men to end this scourge. How does someone who makes his living in an inherently violent sport fight violence in the home?

The answer to that question encompasses a lifetime, but it can be boiled down to one word: faith. It was God who steered me away from a path followed by many kids who experience domestic violence—becoming an abuser myself. It was God who enabled football to become a transformative force in my life.