The Essential Role Of Your Partner In Birth

Birth can feel like a one-person job, but a loving partner can make all the difference in the delivery room, writes Samantha Steele

- Samantha Steele

A SECURE PARTNERSHIP is your strongest asset through pregnancy and birth. Yet for many of us, the journey to motherhood can feel lonely. After all, how much can your partner truly understand about this tiny life growing inside you, the changes your body’s going through – and your imminent birth experience? And what is the role of a partner through these experiences? Quite simply, “The partner’s role is to support their partner physically, emotionally and spiritually,” says Dr Heather Allan-Gould, a gynaecologist based in Sandton.

That is easier said than done. Your birth partner might not be sure how to get involved without being intrusive, and help without getting in the way.

And, most of all, they probably don’t know how to best support an intense and often painful experience?

Added to this, many of us don’t realise that labour can be scary and overwhelming for our partners – to see a person they might love very much go through the pain of childbirth and know that there is very little they can do about it… “Even though I’m an experienced doctor, and I’ve seen many women give birth, I felt very helpless seeing Kyla in pain and not really being able to do much to alleviate that for her,” Dr Yair Edinburg, a Joburg-based GP, explains about their birthing experience.

YOUR TRAVEL GUIDE?

Surprises, emergencies and curveballs are all part of the typical birth experience. This is why several experts and parents recommend not only clear communication, but also sharing goals and boundaries with your partner prior to the first contraction.

Dr Allan-Gould says it’s important for partners to offer support no matter what. They should stay calm, keep an open mind and remain flexible. “It doesn’t always go according to plan,” she warns.