Rewired!

“Resilience” is a buzzword these days in areas as diverse as business, sport and personal growth. Everyone wants to be resilient, but how do you achieve it? Here are seven techniques to rewire yourself and bounce back.

- Jessica Lee

When you face a challenge in your life, do you feel equipped to handle it or do you become overwhelmed and stuck in the difficulty, grief or even the unfairness of your situation? Whether you are facing an illness, career change, divorce, family challenge, or any other significant difficulty, there are techniques you can use to build optimism and rewire your brain for resilience.

1. Embrace the power of vulnerability

“Vulnerability is not weakness. And that myth is profoundly dangerous,” says vulnerability and courage expert Brene Brown. When I became a mum for the first time last year I discovered why being real and vulnerable was crucial to building resilience.

In the early days when our little guy was not sleeping well, unsettled and crying all night, I quickly became overwhelmed. All I wanted to do was sleep, have a break and at times go back to my old life with all its freedom.

In those exceptionally difficult days I let myself feel what I was feeling. Some days that meant sitting on the bathroom floor and having a good cry; other days it was having a truthful conversation with my husband or mum about how hard I was finding it. It most certainty meant asking for and accepting help.

At first I felt guilty for feeling and thinking this way. I wondered if I was a “bad mum” for not loving every minute of motherhood. It took courage to be vulnerable and let my guard down. However, once I got over the guilt, I found that letting myself unravel released builtup emotion and actually created space in my mind to reconnect with my inner strength and to think, “OK, Jess, get up and keep going — you can do this!”