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Their wedding list is too pricey for us

Q We've been invited to the wedding of a close friend’s daughter. I’d love to go, as I've known her all her life. The problem is there’s nothing on her wedding list we can afford. I can’t go if I can’t take a present. I don’t want to put my friend in a difficult position by explaining the situation.

Susan, London

There’s no rule that you have to buy something off the wedding list. People put things on as a guide to what they like, as well as specific items they want. Check the list so you can see their taste and colour scheme, and then find something small that you think they'll like and will fit with their decor. If there isn’t anything, you can always buy a plant in a neutral pot, which I’m sure they'll love. The last thing they'll want is for you to feel you can’t go because of their wedding list. They invited you for you, not your present.

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