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Our MARRIAGE survived an AFFAIR

Woman & Home UK

|

July 2025

Gripped by Cheat on Netflix? One woman, Jo*, shares her experience

- JACKIE BROWN

Our MARRIAGE survived an AFFAIR

When I started at university in the late 90s, I sat beside a gorgeous girl who became my new best friend - and fell in love with her brother, Paul*. We've been together ever since.

We married in 2005, and had busy lives bringing up two sons and holding down challenging jobs. I was in the retail industry and Paul worked in finance.

We'd been married for about 10 years when I spotted text messages on his phone that were not meant for my eyes. They were between my husband and a woman he'd met on a weekend boys' ski holiday. It seemed clear to me something was going on but when I confronted him about the texts, he was adamant that I was reading too much into them. It was a complicated situation, as we were going on a family holiday the next day with our sons, who were both under 10.

It was a difficult trip. If I ever look back at photos, I can see the mental strain on my face. Although Paul denied having an affair, he agreed we should get help, as the fact he had been secretive highlighted something was missing in our relationship. We started marriage counselling, and with therapy, we decided to put the past behind us and move on.

WhatsApp messages

However, two years later, in 2016, I got WhatsApp messages from the same woman, who had got hold of my number. She told me the relationship had continued. Paul, who was with me, tried to grab the phone from me - but it was too late. From the photos she sent, he couldn't deny anything. I had no idea. At the time, I was dealing with the loss of my mother, who had died a few months before. I went to see the GP and was diagnosed with PTSD and clinical depression. I also had insomnia and disordered eating. I think a lot of it was due to shock.

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