SATISFACTORY'S FACTORY CART

Why build factories when you could be doing sick wheelies?

- Wes Fenlon

Satisfactory only looks like it’s a videogame about efficiency. It seems to be a game about automating the means of production, of perfectly balancing the inputs and outputs of a dozen, then a hundred, then a thousand machines until they’re all producing at maximum performance in a harmonious song of plate-stamping and boltthreading. This is a complete ruse.

I know it’s a ruse because one of the first items added to Satisfactory’s AWESOME Shop of optional-yetvital unlockable items is the Factory Cart. The Factory Cart is a small vehicle that forces your character to essentially bend in half and hunch over to fit inside it—think Mr Bean’s car, if Mr Bean were LeBron James’ height. As soon as you can access the Factory Cart Satisfactory becomes less about efficiency and more about absurdity, because it’s impossible not to deploy it from your pocket and drive it around your factory floor with the same recklessness of a child who hasn’t yet broken an RC car by driving it into too many table legs. The Factory Cart is indestructible, but you’ll probably spend more time toppling over in it or tumbling wheels over roof as soon as you collide with a small incline at 15 miles per hour.