Who's afraid of growing old?

Why are we afraid of growing old indeed?

- JOANNE RAE M. RAMIREZ

Sonia Mayor with grandson Carl Francis Ramirez

For me, it’s no fun defying gravity.But as former Assumption College president Dr. Pinky Valdes, who is now 82 but looks 62, says, “Growing old is transformative. Stop looking outside. Look inside and develop your heart.”

“And when I say growing older, I’m talking about the age of 40 and up. I’m not talking about 60 years old. You remember the famous story about the caterpillar becoming a butterfly? What actually happens is more or less, when we hit around the age of 40 or more, it begins to switch. The wings are starting to appear, and we’re supposed to be totally free. Unfortunately, this doesn’t happen if we're clinging to being a worm or a caterpillar. If we’re stuck to it, then we don’t get out of it. So here’s what happens.” Neurologically, says Pinky, we fear the ravages of aging.

“Most of us are afraid to get Alzheimer’s, right? Or dementia. Physically, we're not as strong as we were at 35. Psychologically, things hit us differently.”

Pinky says a lot of the changes of aging are beyond one’s control.

“We can do a lot about some of them, but some of it we do not have control of. So we're looking for an answer, and some people say, well, they do facelifts, and some people buy a sports car, which they’ve never had one before. And some men, unfortunately, look after younger women. And we're looking for the solution in the wrong place.”