A Passage to a Forgotten India

A British woman reminisces about her early years she spent in Delhi and the deep bond she formed with her Ayah

- HANNAH CHARLTON

One kiss on the cheek, one kiss on the nose, one kiss on the other cheek'. This was Marjorie's bedtime ritual in Delhi with her Indian nursemaid, her Ayah, who had been her primary carer since the age of seven months. This gesture was in clear defiance of her mother's orders to her: 'You must not kiss Ayah goodnight. She's a servant and an Indian'. By the age of three Marjorie had navigated her way between the powerful emotional bond she had formed with her Ayah (she was called Byah) and the duty and obedience she owed to her mother. She rapidly learned to comply with her parents' chosen status but at the same time to cherish her attachment to Byah who cared for her till she was eight when they were abruptly separated forever.

This is the story of Marjorie's journey from the arms of her Ayah to her highly conformist, institutionalised period in a boarding school on her return to England, followed by her much later-in-life unravelling and processing of her early life distress and resistance to the racism around her. Her life story reflects aspects of the British empire and colonial life and its legacy that are now being extensively re-examined by both colonial and colonised generations.