Shrekking: The controversial new dating trend that challenges attraction norms

IF YOU’VE ever felt like dating in 2025 is more complicated than it should be, you're not imagining things.

- VUYILE MADWANTSI

Between apps, shifting cultural norms and viral dating trends, navigating love today is almost a full-time job.

“Finding and keeping love today is harder than at any point in human history,” says Paul C. Brunson, the author of Find Love and global relationship insights expert for Tinder.

In the past, people mostly sought a partner for survival or stability: someone to raise children with or share household responsibilities.

Fast-forward to now, and our expectations are sky-high.

According to Eli Finkel’s book, The All-or-Nothing Marriage, many people expect their partners to be their best friend, co-parent, business partner, intellectual equal, emotional anchor and lover.

That's a lot for one person to carry.

With so many types of relationships considered acceptable today - monogamy, polyamory, long-distance, living apart together and more ~ finding a partner whose values and lifestyle truly align with your own can be challenging.

Just when you thought dating trends couldn't get any more confusing, comes along Gen Z’s newest dating trend, “shrekking”.

This trend is inspired by the animated film Shrek.

It encourages people to date someone they don't find physically attractive, hoping that they'll be treated better in return. In other words, date “an ogre” for the “princess treatment”.

Cute name, bad idea, say experts.