RICHARD IRVINE

DOUBLE TROUBLE FOR A FIRST TIME DAD OF TWINS Emma's a chip off the old block ...and the block's feeling its age

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"Where's Grandma?" Emma shouted in a demanding fashion.

"I don't know, try the greenhouse," I suggested, so she sprinted off to track down her prey. As soon as she left, grandma emerged from the downstairs toilet, clutching a cup of tea, and asked, "has she gone?"

Just as I was about to bellow, "she's here", grandma pleaded, "no, don't tell her, I'm exhausted".

"I locked myself in the loo to drink this, she won't leave me alone, I can’t keep up," she confided.

The children and myself had been staying at my parents', while Victoria 'worked'. I use quotation marks because I often stay at home to 'work' whenever Victoria stays with her parents, and she’s adopted a similar way of obtaining a little downtime.