Six barriers to great listening

WE live in a world that seems to be getting busier and busier. We not only have our daily work tasks to do we also have more meetings, longer commutes and more interactions with more people in different locations than at any time in the history of work.

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ROBERT BISWAS-DIENER, CHRISTIAN VAN NIEUWERBURGH

In this busy working landscape, making meaningful and productive connections has seldom been more challenging - and the skill of listening well has therefore never been more important.

As two positive psychology experts, we've identified six of the most common internal barriers that can interfere with your ability to listen well.

Comparing

Sometimes the topic of a conversation seems to invite you to share your own and similar experiences. Rather than appreciating the speaker's experiences, you are mentally reminiscing and preparing to offer your own carefully chosen anecdote.

We call this comparing. What you should be considering is what the speaker is implicitly asking for in the conversation. It might be admiration from you, an acknowledgment of their enthusiasm or a bit of respect for their work.

Competing

People are social creatures and it's common for friends and colleagues to share challenges they are experiencing.

An office mate might say: "I'm really struggling to get through my emails! I have over 200 unread emails sitting in my inbox".