A Mother’s Bold Goodbye

Gaslighted, dismissed, and told to be patient, Hania's story exposes the invisible violence that hides behind “happy marriages in the valley.

- Gowher Bhat

It was a blistering summer day in Pulwama. The sky was open and clear, and schoolchildren were filing into classrooms under tall walnut trees. Hania stood at the blackboard, white chalk in hand. Her voice was soft but steady, her smile practiced. She looked like someone in control.

But inside, she was quietly rebuilding a life undone by love.

For three years, she had lived with a man who never hit her, never screamed at her in public, never left a mark anyone else could see.

Yet every day, he chipped away at her, word by word, silence by silence.

"He would send long messages when we were dating,” she said. “Did you eat? I love you. No one can love you like I do.’ I thought that was love. I was 24. It felt real.”

They married within a year. From the outside, it looked right. A thoughtful husband, a quiet teacher, a peaceful home. But after the wedding, she noticed the small controls.

“He didn't like my friends. Said they were too modern,” she said. “Then he asked me to quit teaching. Said it was to protect me. And I thought, that must be love, right?”

It wasn't.