FELLA IS WITH MY COUSIN

I’M tempted to organise an orgy and invite every single guy I know.

- 

Why shouldn’t I have fun when I've been so cruelly let down by my ex?

Hear me out... I’m a hot catch. I have a great body and personality. So, I’m struggling to understand why my bloke has traded me in for my cousin who has the personality of a slug.

This “Plain Jane” recently joined 30 of us at my uncle’s beach wedding in Crete. It was a perfect setting right on the sea.

But, minutes into the reception, my great aunt collapsed in the heat. My bloke is a paramedic and rushed to help. My plain cousin has some first aid training, so she waded in too.

‘The pair of them ended up accompanying my aunt to hospital and staying up all night. There was nothing I could do so I got stuck into the booze and partied hard with siblings. I had a blast.