Spectrum of Connections

The present standards of dating or loving are restricting us from loving many people in their many forms

- Duha

“YOUR love is invalid”, “This won’t last long”, “If this is consensual, how is this polyamory”, “I could never do it, you are brave to believe in this”—these are just a few of the sentences that are thrown at me casually by people either from a perspective of being curious or sheer disgust. All this is in the attempt that I too start confining to the norms of monogamy. Prompts like jealousy and instability are universal human experiences and not just confined to polyamory or ethical nonmonogamous relationships.

Rather than giving you a textbook or Google definition of what ethical non-monogamy or polyamory is, I will use this opportunity to quote my partner because the diverse forms of love we share with each other encompass the entire universe for me.

One of my partners, “P”, says polyamory is freedom. It is a reminder that no human being belongs to you and that people and connections are transient. It also allows one to have a larger chosen family through my partner and their various forms of sexual/romantic/platonic or any other form of connections. It allows one to have all the people who matter to their partner as part of their life and all of us are collectively united around a larger banner of polycule. That’s a lot of love for a lifetime that one would never want to trade for the restrictive shackles of monogamy.