Get Comfortable on That Tightrope

How embracing paradoxes with "both/ and" thinking can help people get along

- WENDY SMITH and MARIANNE LEWIS

Today's world is becoming increasingly fractured. Confirmation bias abounds where people stay within safe circles of friends and colleagues who agree with them, and the opinions they hear mirror their own rather than confront opposing views and invite controversy. But what if there's a better way? What if thinking about things as "both/and" rather than "either/or" could allow people to truly talk to one another and expand their minds to new possibilities? In their new book from Harvard Business Review Press, paradox experts Wendy Smith and Marianne Lewis explain how to apply "both/and" thinking to today's most vexing issues-from navigating life, work and leadership in the post-pandemic era to curbing political polarization. In the excerpt below from BOTH/AND THINKING: EMBRACING CREATIVE TENSIONS TO SOLVE YOUR TOUGHEST PROBLEMS, they discuss how to heal political divides with family and friends.

RECENTLY A FRIEND CONFIDED in us. She voted for Clinton in the 2016 election. Her husband voted for Trump. She was horrified when she heard the Dobbs decision. Her husband felt it was justified. They decided that they could not talk politics at the kitchen table, in bed or, in fact, anywhere at home. They felt embarrassed talking about these issues in front of their friends. The tension was palpable.