A NO-STRESS GUIDE TO GIFT GIVING & RECEIVING

It's the thought that counts, right? Right?!

- JENNIFER KING LINDLEY

LET'S UNWRAP SOMETHING: In a recent survey from LendingTree, an online loan marketplace, 56% of those polled said gift giving stressed them out. In fact, exchanging presents is a common topic in therapy, says Barbara Greenberg, PhD, a clinical psychologist in Weston, Connecticut. Because it isn't just about which scented candle to get your mother-in-law. "Behind it all, people are worried about the relationship and doing damage to the connection," she says. Most of us want to give something that screams, I totally get you and appreciate you, so I effortlessly came up with this super-thoughtful gift because that's the kind of person I am! On the receiving end, "we put a lot of emphasis on gifts as symbols of how much somebody likes you and, more importantly, how well they know you," Greenberg says. It's tricky to be a gracious recipient when you unbox something that's decidedly not you. Take a deep breath and use these tips to find comfort and joy in giving and receiving, so you can be mindful and present (heh) this season.

Ask for a Wish List

We often think that a truly successful gift has to be a surprise, says Jeff Galak, PhD, associate professor of marketing at Carnegie Mellon University's Tepper School of Business and founder of GiftStar, a gift recommendation app. The data doesn't support this, he says. "Givers are focused on the big reveal: How can I dazzle and put a smile on their face?" But Galak's research has found that recipients most value usefulness and enjoyment. "No one has ever said, 'Gosh, I'm so disappointed to receive exactly what I wanted!" he jokes.

Or Write Their List for Them