EXPERT ADVICE: GET OVER BEING GHOSTED

Whether it was a promising potential partner or a so-called friend who pulled a disappearing act.

-  JENNA RYU

But getting over being ghosted, is a lot harder than most people want to admit.

At first, it seems like an easy thing to brush off. So what if they're not texting back? People do it for all sorts of reasons, many of which aren't personal. “Some just don’t want to deal with the anxiety, annoyance or the actual conversation of ending a relationship,” says Patrice N. Douglas, a Los Angeles-based clinical psychologist. But the mental-health effects of getting ghosted often run deep, potentially causing more heartache than a full-blown breakup.

When you're suddenly cut off and left without answers, it's easy to second-guess every interaction and take the rejection personally. But relationship experts agree you don't need that one final “goodbye” message to find peace. Here, they explain how to get over being ghosted and stop it from shaking your self-esteem.

1 Ask them about it

Depending on the situation (like how long you've known the person), you could straight-up ask for an explanation. Obviously, “it may not make as much sense for somebody you've known for three days versus one you've known for six years,” Dr Douglas says. “But there's nothing wrong with saying, 'I haven't heard from you in a few weeks - I just want to see if everything's okay.’”

That said, you should also be prepared for the possibility that they still won't reply — or worse, they'll give you an answer that stings. “As much as we want open communication and honesty, people don't owe that to us,” Dr Douglas adds. “You can try to reach out, but you'll also have to come to your own resolution if they don't respond.”

2 Reframe ghosting as a sign of bad communication