Karen Dillon Does your company have too much conflict, or too little? Here's why healthy conflict is key to business success.

I've always prided myself on getting along with others. But a few years ago, one colleague got under my skin.

- Karen Dillon

Karen Dillon is a former editor of Harvard Business Review and a New York Times best-selling author. She currently serves as editorial director of BanyanGlobal Family Business Advisors, where she heads the firm's thought leadership on the challenges faced by family-owned businesses around the world.

A forceful advocate for his own ideas, he would sometimes talk over co-workers—including me—who asked questions or had a different perspective. I stewed over how difficult he was to work with. But that's all I did—I silently stewed.

After one unusually frustrating meeting, I decided not to let it go. When this colleague came by my office later that day, I explained why he might have sensed my tension in the meeting. My candor, in turn, inspired some from him. We quickly realized we had misread each other's intentions. What I saw as pushiness, he viewed as enthusiasm. What he saw as a negative peppering of questions was my way of trying to better understand his idea. We agreed to be more direct with each other and to address any brewing disagreements one-on-one. Our relationship and collaborative work immediately improved.

My aversion to conflict is not uncommon. Amy Gallo, author of