Burnout Paradise Remastered

Burnout Paradise Remastered

- Dave Meikleham

In real life, driving isn’t that glamorous. I recently passed my test at the grand old age of 32, and let me tell you, repeatedly performing parking maneuvers or reversing into a bay is more Fussy & Fastidious than Fast & Furious. Thankfully, Criterion’s take on driving is a hell of a lot more fun than the real thing.

The original Burnout Paradise first hit Xbox 360 over ten years ago. I now feel so disgustingly ancient, I can feel the cartilage in my knees disintegrating with sadness. Not that you’ll feel like you’re playing a decade-old title when you boot up this surprisingly spry remaster. With its breezy open world, addictive event structure, cute online challenges, and plethora of horribly moreish shortcut gates and billboards to smash, Paradise feels like every inch the modern racer.

While the car-wrecking, blisteringly quick 60fps action is still fresh, visually you won’t mistake Criterion’s riotous road trip for a 2018 title. Even though Stellar Entertainment has done a fine job reworking road and building textures, as well as notably improving smoke and spark effects, this clearly remains a last-gen game with an extra shiny paint job. If you own an Xbox One X, the bump to 4K makes the searing sights and sounds sumptuous, but if you’re playing on an S or the launch model, the 1080p results aren’t nearly as impressive.

Takedown and out

Not that you should be stopping to admire the roadside textures down at Harbor Town.