Trigger Happy

Shoot first, ask questions later

- STEVEN POOLE

When humans are gone, perhaps the species that takes over will design a game series called Anthropocene Park

One of the finest examples of corporate euphemism in cinema comes in Jurassic World (2015): “Ladies and gentlemen, due to a containment anomaly, all guests must take shelter immediately”. “Containment anomaly”, of course, is PR speak for “the dinosaurs have escaped”, just as Elon Musk’s talk of a “rapid unscheduled disassembly” was an ironic acknowledgment that one of his rockets had blown up. The word ‘anomaly’ itself comes from the ancient Greek for “against natural law”, so – and I’m sure the screenwriters intended this nuance too – the whole of Jurassic Park was an anomaly from the beginning.

There have, I regret to say, also been many containment anomalies during my time with Jurassic World Evolution 2, while I was forgetting that raptors can climb fences or distracted by the disgruntled state of my staff. It may even be the case that some customers were sadly eaten. If so, they should stop at the customer-service facility next to the exit and we will be happy to offer a full refund.