LAUGHTER

The best Medicine

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A guy’s grandfather clock stopped working. He called a repair shop to get it fixed, but they wanted $50 to come get it.

“I’ll bring it to you,” the guy said. So he strapped the clock to his back and started walking down the big hill he lived on. Halfway down, he slipped, and he slid down the hill into town just as a lady was crossing the street. He barreled into her and knocked her over.

Dazed, disgruntled, and still on the ground, she asked, “Why can’t you just wear a wristwatch-like everyone else?!” —Submitted by Roger Rakoff Clinton Township, Michigan

How Smart Is It?

I have a smart fridge. I pin its homework on my children. —Ed Night, comedian

A real smart TV would increase the volume when you start eating chips. —wert52 on reddit.com