I'm Just A Girl Who Can't Say ‘No'

‘I’d rather poke my own eye out than tell people that I don’t have time to help them’

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As a life-long, card-holding, people-pleaser, I find it very hard to say “No” when asked to do someone a favour. Neither my gender nor my nationality make it easy for me to tell people that I don’t have time to help them out, and I’d rather poke my own eye out than tell them I just don’t want to.

I’d hate to be that person who doesn’t do an extra supermarket shop, drive someone to a hospital appointment or support a charity, especially when none of those things are exactly onerous. And sometimes saying “No” has disastrous consequences: I was making a film in New Zealand and was asked by a local charity to attend a fund-raising event the next week. Since my own charity, the Starlight Children’s Foundation, had a similar mission: helping seriously children, I double-checked with my head office that it wouldn’t be a problem. After much debate they concluded that actually it might be confusing for their founder to be publicly linked to such a similar charity and suggested I politely decline. With a heavy heart I did just that, but offered to do some fund-raising privately.