When unleashing my inner Hulk is a bad idea

Getting angry when my eight-year-old child is not yet able to display maturity can give off mixed signals about what is right or wrong

- Raymond Goh

Confession: One of my biggest parenting mistakes, and a blunder I commit repeatedly, is expecting my daughter, JJ, to be a reasonable and lucid child at the tender age of eight.

Whenever her actions (or inaction) fail any litmus test of logic, I quickly grow stern and sharp, Incredible-Hulking from Fun Papa to an ornery curmudgeon.

Take, for example, when JJ completely disregards the immutable laws of physics to snatch a brimming cup of Milo off the table. The combination of inertia and gravity results in the saccharine cocoa spilling everywhere.

And if the hot beverage were to scald her gently, I would be simultaneously crossed and concerned, which I imagine must be confusing for JJ.

But not nearly as confusing as when I proceed to rebuke her recklessness with a few harsh words: “Which part of Newtonian mechanics don’t you understand?!”

Or when JJ proffers a sorry excuse for committing some juvenile misdeed, like neglecting to complete her homework before going off to play with the neighbour. “But Vanessa was already waiting for me to do some drawing together!”

This logical fallacy grates me even more so than a careless Milo grenade and I cannot help but to challenge her crude reasoning: “Which part of non sequitur don’t you understand?!?”

My outbursts inspire both contrition and confusion from the poor child, but it does nothing for her understanding of Newton’s three laws of motion, or Plato’s art of sound reasoning. Her main learnings from these episodes are probably Papa doesn’t like Milo and hates art.

For the record, I like Milo and I find art quite tolerable.