I Used To Be Impatient. Then I Became A Granddad

For grandparents, patience is a superpower — and the reward is priceless, says the writer.

- Jeffery Tan

Three years ago, in August, I entered one of life's most rewarding roles: grandfatherhood.

What began as a joyful new chapter has since become a profound personal learning experience, filled with wisdom, love and unexpected insights.

Research shows that grandparenting significantly impacts one's emotional well-being, family dynamics and even longevity.

As I reflect on my third anniversary as a grandfather, I have distilled a few key life lessons — supported by psychology, sociology and personal experience — that have reshaped my perspective on family, ageing and happiness.

I have discovered that there is science behind this relationship. Studies reveal that strong grandparent-grandchild relationships contribute to some rather surprising outcomes — from higher emotional well-being for both generations to reduced depression and loneliness in older adults and, interestingly, improved social and cognitive development in grandchildren.

When my granddaughter first called me 爷爷 (yé yé) (grandpa in Mandarin), I felt an instant shift in my mindset. On being "promoted" to the "grand" level, I wasn't just an older family member — I was now expected to be a source of wisdom, comfort and fun.

My vision of grandfathers had to be updated, as both my paternal and maternal grandfathers (when I first knew them) were rather elderly. If I am to be candid, respectfully, both gentlemen did not strike me as being sources of fun then.

My relationship with my granddaughter Emma is quite a different experience. Our bond has strengthened through storytelling, play and simple moments like squirting each other with water from spray bottles meant for watering plants around the home. I would never have dared contemplate such an activity with either of my grandfathers.