Being diagnosed with ADHD as an adult left me feeling betrayed

My late diagnosis meant a difficult and misunderstood time in school. But being able to put a name to my symptoms also means I can start helping myself

- Teo Kai Xiang

When I received my diagnosis for attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) earlier in 2025, I was relieved at first – and then very, very angry.

Relief came because I finally had an explanation for the challenges that have defined my daily existence.

That constant feeling of being in a rush and never feeling settled. Struggling to sit for long periods of time. Taking half an hour to leave the house because I often forget or misplace something important multiple times over.

Burning the midnight oil perpetually and having dark rings beneath my eyes, because most of my productivity happens in the quiet hours between 1 and 3am the night before a deadline.

After this relief, anger soon followed. Why had it taken so long to find this out?

As my psychiatrist pointed out, the signs were "extremely obvious". And yet, he added, my neurodivergence likely went undiagnosed because awareness and attitudes towards ADHD remain in their infancy in Singapore.

AM I A 'BAD STUDENT'?

With the benefit of hindsight, my "delinquent" school experiences now appear in a different light.

My Secondary 3 report card lists my conduct as "poor", with my grades ranging between F9s and D7s and an LIR5 grade of 52, partly because of poor attendance and truancy.

At the age of 14, I often cut class by taking the MRT well beyond my school's stop because I so dreaded being in school.

I remember my form teacher telling me my truancy was a "disgrace" to my parents' hard work. Conversations with the school counsellor focused on the stress I was inflicting on my family instead of how my neurodivergence might be shaping my experience of school.

A child psychiatrist I saw diagnosed me with depression and prescribed antidepressants, missing the underlying reasons entirely.