Candida's portrait

A prominent photograph in our home in Gulod is a portrait of my late mother, Candida.

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She was wearing a short dress with big, bright pink flowers. She was standing amidst a garden in Taipei, her left hand on her hip, suggesting her mood of the day: celebratory, carefree and confident. Mirrored in her lipstick-smudged smile was a glorious day. It was June 6, 2019—her 75th birthday.

That portrait of her moves around the house. Sometimes it's in the living room, standing on the tiled floor, side by side with a vase of flowers. A few times, it's on the dining table, during Noche Buena, or during a birthday celebration of a family member. At times it's on top of the bookshelf that faces the back door. When we enter the back door, her smile is the first thing to greet us. On Christmas Day and New Year's Day, our traditional family picture-taking under the himbaba-o tree will not be complete without us carrying her portrait, as well as my father's photo.

Sometimes Candida's portrait travels with us, to Sonya's Garden by the Sea in Nasugbu, to celebrate her 79th birth anniversary, her first birthday after she was gone.

In commemoration of her 80th birthday last year, Nanay's portrait was also present in a private space at Café Ilang-ilang in Manila Hotel. When Gabby, her apo, graduated cum laude at the University of Santo Tomas, Gabby carried the portrait of her grandmother from the graduation venue up to the picture-taking at the UST grounds.

Twice a year, on Nov. 1 and May 21, her death anniversary, we bring the portrait to the cemetery. Last Wednesday, on the occasion of Nanay's second birthday in heaven, we brought her picture with us to the cemetery. Bittersweet memories.