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Playing it by the book

The Independent

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July 19, 2025

It feels tricky to live a busy, friend-filled life in 2025 without having a militantly organised diary system. Ellie Harrison talks to those who embrace planning and those who resist it

- By Ellie Harrison

Playing it by the book

Recently, I've noticed a split among my friends and acquaintances. On one side, hopping around like excitable bunnies, are what I'd call the super schedulers. Those who book dinners with friends six weeks in advance, who send out Google Calendar invites to lock in a picnic, and who already have a pint in the diary for a Tuesday in August.

In many ways, they feel like they’re in step with the times. This is, after all, the age of hyperconnectivity. Then there are the people of old, the more spontaneous socialisers. In my mind, they are like felines stretched out in the sun. They prefer to make decisions on the fly and keep their diaries gleefully free of ink - certainly, their hackles will be raised if you try to organise a Sunday lunch too far in the future.

Vicky, a 31-year-old strategy director, falls into the former camp. She often finds she has plans for several weekends in advance when she looks in her diary - far from filling her with dread, it makes her happy. “I appreciate having something to look forward to each weekend, and I actually feel strange if I look at a weekend and there’s nothing planned. It’s too...” - she seems to audibly shudder - “I just like having at least one thing!”

On the other hand, 31-year-old business owner Ben loves to have “a whole weekend unencumbered” and admits he feels irritated when he looks at his diary and its pages are full. He would much rather not have minor plans booked ahead.

“I understand the need for it,” he says, “but I personally much prefer to live my life by deciding on a given day or week what I fancy. There’s every chance that I won’t fancy a dinner I’ve got booked in three weeks because, when it comes around, I might have had a very busy week at work. Or if it’s lunch on a Sunday, that’s a disaster,” he laughs, “because I might want to go away for a whole weekend or do something that I am, as yet, unaware of, but then I can’t do it because I have to, well, eat food! With people!”

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