Family audit reveals kids' contribution is priceless

DOUBLE TROUBLE FOR A FIRST TIME DAD OF TWINS

- RICHARD IRVINE

"What exactly do they bring to the party?" I asked myself about the children in my weekly family audit.

Thankfully, the answer was, "quite a lot", as I wasn't sure what I'd have done had they been deemed worthless, given they're too young to work, and I can't return them for a refund now.

Obviously, we've got the cliché of children and Christmas, where their role can't be underestimated.

For me, I'd reached an age in life where all that festivity got in the way of a public holiday, made everywhere busy and cost too much, but then I had children.

It was a true Christmas miracle - everything was magical once more, even if it involved less alcohol, a very early start and lots of things on the TV I didn't want to watch.