Mary, the peas, the miserable old farmer and his Land Rover

Something happened the other day that really wound me up. This is happening more often-me getting annoyed - and initially I assumed it was because of my situation in life: living with the same person for 20 years (that's marginally less than the guy who attempted to murder Salman Rushdie's just got) and spending every waking hour either ferrying my young children to some kind of activity or arguing with them about how much of their tea they must eat before they can have pudding (standard daily exchange...Me: "Mary, we've been here half an hour now and you've only eaten three peas. If you eat two more you can have rice pudding." Her: [no response, but folds her arms and glares at me in the way an assassin might before he blows his victim's head off]. Me: "For the love of god Mary, they are peas. They're tiny. Eat two more right now before I put you up for adoption.")

- Steve Canavan

But being grumpier, say scientists, is simply part of the ageing process.

This is down to-and apologies for thoroughly depressing any older readers-a combination in your dotage of physical discomfort (in your 20s you barely get an ache or pain, whereas by the time you hit 50 it's hard to get a leg out of the bathtub without pulling a hamstring); social isolation (I'm 49 and used to be out on the town several times a week, whereas now I write in my calendar 'November 27-pint with Andy' and countdown to it with all the gusto and enthusiasm of the BBC and the Olympics); cognitive changes and a declining ability to focus on one task (since writing the previous sentence I've been to Tesco Express to buy carrots and washed the car); and changes in communication (older folk become less tolerant of perceived nonsense, which is perhaps why's my daughter's refusal to eat a garden pea makes me want to throw her headfirst out of the kitchen window). Anyway, proof if proof were required that I'm a bad-tempered so and so happened at the weekend, on a narrow country lane.

Let me explain.

It was one of those rural roads wide enough for only one car and so there are passing places where you can pull in-on the off-chance you need telling what a passing place is-to allow other vehicles through.