What to do when a loved one dies

Losing a spouse or relative doesn't just leave you awash with grief, there's also a mountain of paperwork. Here CFO Laura Linden shares her simple 10-step plan for dealing with 'deathmin'

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Losing a loved one is one of the hardest things in life we all face.

Yet, amid dealing with the devastating feelings of grief and loss, there are pressing matters to attend to — a mountain of administrative tasks now described as “deathmin”.

Everything your loved one owned needs to be sorted through, accounted for, passed on, sold or thrown out. The details of their estate also needs to be collected, assessed and any bills, fees and taxes paid out.

While some of our dear departed have spent a lifetime of efficiency keeping all their passwords, account numbers and paperwork neatly filed and accessible, others will have let brown envelopes pile up and shoved invoices down the back of the sofa.

But whatever your deceased loved one's style, my step-by-step guide will help make sorting through it manageable and methodical. It involves some of the techniques I use as a 'fractional Chief Finance Officer' - helping businesses with their budgeting, cash flow management, troubleshooting and helping them plan for the future.

Here's my 10-part plan for using this professional know-how to get through the tasks that face you during your grief, and you may even pick up some tips for your own end-of-life planning...

1. You've got more time than you think

When someone dies, everything feels urgent. It isn't. Apart from notifying close family and making sure dependents and pets are safe, most financial tasks can wait a few days. You don't have to close every account or file every form immediately. The system makes it sound like you do but that's nonsense.

Give yourself a moment to breathe, cry, or just sit still. Clarity comes back once the panic settles. Think of this first step as the emotional equivalent of finding your footing before you start sorting the mess.

2. Make a money map before you touch anything