Learning to say no to an abusive marriage

This is an appeal to the parents of daughters.

- Namita Bhandare

Marriage is not their final destination. It is career and financial independence. Girls are not paraya dhan (someone else’s wealth) to be brought up to understand that their “own” homes are not the one they are born into but the one they marry into. Stop bringing them to be self-effacing, sacrificing and silent — like their mothers.

Ban this one word from your conversation with them: Adjust.

Teach them the power of saying no.

Believe them if they tell you they are in an unhappy marriage where they are being disrespected, even abused for any reason, including not bringing sufficient dowry. Let them know they can always come home, if that’s what they want. Do consider your legal options but ensure their safety first.