It's Brest-beating baking

IN CASE you’ve fallen a bit behind with this year’s BAKE OFF: THE PROFESSIONALS (8pm, Channel 4), allow me to bring you up to speed with what’s happened so far.

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Well, what's happened so far is that some people have done some baking. Some of it has been good, to the point where judges Benoit Blin and Cherish Finden have been making the most encouraging noises, if not always the most comprehensible ones.

And some of it has been less so, to the point where Benoit and Cherish have been forced to point a finger at the worst offenders and say: “With regret, you're fired.” Or words to that effect. And, well, that’s about it really.

I shan’t bother you with details of the contestants’ little quirks or personality traits because I’ve never got the feeling it’s that kind of show.