Mom's Wall-Sign Wisdom

She never met a plaque or bumper sticker she didn't quote

- Sarah Cooper

AFTER MY DIVORCE, I remember finding out I wasn't going to get child support. We don't have kids, but I still wanted child support, you know? I wanted inner child support. And so I was crying and crying and hugging my mom and she hugged me back and said, "Sarah, don't sweat the small stuff. And guess what? It's all small stuff."

And I was like, "Mom... that's the sign above the couch. I turned around and pointed it out to her. "Did you just read that to me?"

That's when I realized that my mom is just like the guy at the end of The Usual Suspects. She's just been reading the HomeGoods decor around the house to give me advice.

Once I called her and said I didn't know if I'd ever get married again. She said, "Sarah, you have to dance like no one is watching."

And I said, "Mom, are you in the guest bathroom right now?" She said no but then she launched into something about footsteps in the sand, and I know that's the framed print above the towel rack!